I was sitting in the bathtub, head against the wall.
Staring, with an emotionless face at the other end of the tub. I exhaled deeply.
I was forcing myself to relax. I poured Epson salt and lavender shampoo into the hot water, then tossed in a bath bomb to top it off. I remained in silence while thinking about the work day I’d just finished. Old problems that I didn’t resolve properly, started to surface again. Now they seemed to be back in full force and stressing me out.
Usually, after a tough day, I’m able to bounce back to the positive side of things. I prided myself on not staying down long. Today was different. I wasn’t able to focus on my tasks and everything aggravated me at an unprecedented rate. I wasn’t able to shake this heavy feeling for 3 days in a row.
I blinked as a bead of sweat slid past my eye.
This silence only invited more reminders of the unsolved problems. I decided to turn on a motivational video to inspire my way out of this funk. “DREAM BIG by Motiversity”, decent place to start I guess. My thoughts about my day and life overall, would occasionally drown out the intense motivational speakers. These two words kept bringing my attention back to the video; “Breaking Point”! ‘Is this my breaking point?’ I thought.”breaking point”! ‘Has my mission of excellence really been broken?’. “You cannot be a champion until you’ve survived a breaking point!”
‘So it’s possible to get past your breaking point’? I perked up and started listening to the video more intently. ‘Am I not motivated enough? Am I just out of my league? How can I get past my breaking point?’ I wiped the sweat from my brow.
Still feeling overwhelmed and exhausted, but at least I knew where I was in life; my breaking point.
“You’re either living for purpose, or you’re living for profit! If you add value to people and serve many; the profit will follow. Those who chase profit over purpose, end up being nothing!”
I’ve always lived with the goal of working hard now so I would have time for my purpose and passions later. Although that sounded like a pretty good plan, sitting in this bathtub at my newly found breaking point; it wasn’t feeling like that good of a plan… It reminded me of my borrowed senior quote.
“Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth” -Mike Tyson
Life doesn’t always go according to plan, especially when finances are the biggest priority. I’m a motivated, ambitious and dedicated man. But I neglected my purpose and I didn’t have my values aligned properly. I would always claim that my current focus is God, family, and finances. In reality, finances took the top spot, then God, and finally family. I noticed that my time spent didn’t match my alleged life motto. I’d spend day, night, and weekends working and studying. I’d pray and read the bible when things got tough. Then I’d squeeze in family time when I really started feeling guilty. These choices led up to me feeling defeated in a bathtub.
Sweaty, embarrassed and emotional, I picked myself up out of my pity party and decided to make some changes in my life. I added a few more values for a healthy and fulfilled life (Faith, Family, Self-Image, Health, Finances). If you don’t currently believe in God, I would highly encourage exploring it. You can message me or comment below if you’re curious about it.
I know some of you are thinking “well if finances are last priority, then I won’t be able to support my family, self-image, and personal health”… I used to think the same thing. That thinking got me in that bathtub… Finances are still important, but I needed to value those other areas of my life over money.
Those values sound good, but how do I start living like this?
I began by writing out actions that would show a healthy standing in each area. Here are just a few examples:
- Pursuing a personal relationship with God (communing, praying, reading the Bible)
- Love people (show compassion towards others and myself)
- Take time to realize that you are always loved (God misses you and wants 1 on 1 time with you)
- Giving/receiving support with others (small groups)
- Spending time together (Dinner, dates, try new things)
- Sharing life together (goals, joys, pains, struggles)
- Loving them in their love language (quality time, gift giving, acts of service, physical touch, words or affirmation)
Learn More with this book (Gary Chapman 5 Love Languages)
- Write out positive declarations (Examples)
- Highlight your best features (as if a loved one would write them about you)
- Be real with yourself (Self-awareness, write out areas where you might have falsely justified your past or current decisions)
- If you’re feeling anxiety or stress, record yourself explaining your situation and why you feel the way you do (It usually isn’t as bad once you hear yourself say it. Getting it out of your head may help you understand the situation.)
- Write out habits you wish to change and set 1 per week you want to work on
- Set a specific goal (a weight you want to be, a way you’d like to look, or how you’d like to feel)
- Create a meal plan
- Create a realistic and duplicatable workout plan (100 push-ups, 100 sit-ups, 100 squats, run 3 miles, (3 days a week))
- Make sure you’re getting essential daily nutrients (See my personal list)
- Get enough sleep
- Create a dream board (places you’ll go, things you’ll do and have, what your daily routine will be once you have the money (be specific))
- Set a number or budget as a goal (hard to hit a target when you don’t have a specific one))
- Research the best options to reach that number (Job promotion, new job, side hustle, investing, affiliate marketing, blogging)
- Focus in on your efforts (don’t spread yourself too thin, choose one or very few ways that will get you to your goal).
These are just some of my personal examples. You can borrow them, or create your own list. Find remodeling company near me. The goal is to have a healthy standing in all 5 areas of your life. If one area starts to lag, make sure to allocate proper time to get it back on track quickly, otherwise, it can start to disrupt other areas.
As I focused on these areas, I began raising the quality of my life and my overall value. The more love and happiness you feel in your life, the more you can give to others. You begin to attract people to you, they want to be around you because you radiate positivity. In turn, you begin to be more fulfilled, opportunities begin to open up to you.
So What’s Next?
I started re-exploring some of my passions and found, what I believe, is my purpose in life. To continuously better myself in these 5 areas of my life, to share my journey (the ups and the downs), and to inspire others to better themselves and find their purpose in life.
Some of you reading this already live with this 5 value system. Click here. I’m extremely happy for your dedication and I ask that you humbly share your testimony to encourage others.
Some of you are not quite there, but you’re on your way. The process is so rewarding, keep going!
Some of you, are in a bathtub staring blankly at the opposite wall… You’re at your breaking point. I want to encourage you to break through it, instead of letting it break you. Re-evaluate the choices that got you there so you can start changing them. Write out examples of a successful value system in your life. Pick a mentor for each value. These mentors should be people who excel in that area of life themselves. These people will counsel you and keep you accountable as you strive to better yourself.
Read books that will give you new perspectives and help you in those areas. I’m sure your mentors will have a few recommendations. The one book I always recommend is Mount of Olives. It’s a short read (about 155 pages), but this book will give you a humbling life perspective and 11 declarations to an extraordinary life. Read through some of the reviews on Amazon if you need further convincing. I’ve read it three times and I intend to read it again very soon Thanks for taking the time to write that book, Michael.
A purpose filled life is amazing, yours is just a few decisions away.
I’m honored that you would take the time to hear my story. I’m still learning about life, but if I can help even one person make a positive change in their life, then I’ve fulfilled my purpose. Be blessed!
I’m so excited to continue sharing my journey with you! If you were encouraged by this article, comment below for more words of encouragement, perspective, and experiences!
“Thank you for sharing your article with me! I loved it! It’s raw, real, relatable, and encouraging. Love the 5 value life!!” – McKenzie